"I flirt with the dalliance that I may rule the world far too much, but it's a fine idea."
"I had no idea such a thing existed until the I saw the word 'breasts' and the pink screaming out at me."
"I drive virtual characters to drink with my crazy schedules, it's an outrage. However, just don't ask me to explain that sentence, because I don't think it's possible."
"I always remember that the actor who was playing Bernard always seemed to be a bit of a miserable sod, very sullen faced which is silly really, I would be ecstatic if I had the ability to stop time, [I'd be] dancing and skipping around all over the place. Then again, I seem to do that normally without this magic watch."
"Did anyone happen to catch Jools Holland last night, though not literally of course, though the idea of chasing Jools Holland with a butterfly net, whilst he tries to escape on his piano (he tries to wheel himself away on it) amuses me greatly"
"I'm one big angsty ball of happiness, despondency and skittishness."
"As he speaks, I'm not really listening, as in my head, all I can hear is the Captain Scarlet theme tune."
"Do newsreaders have lookalikes?"
"I need to go now as a man has just walked by my window with his slippers on walking the dog. I need to cackle loudly."
"I like it when Dale Winton explodes."
"Turns out that I could stall them for a while by splashing Dr. Pepper in their faces."
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